- advertisement -

ALESTORM
Curse of the Crystal Coconut
2020, Napalm

Metal fans are well known for being overly self-serious and that, in large part, is why bands like ALESTORM exist - to take the piss right out of ‘er. If you are anything like me, I personally love that side of the coin. For those unfamiliar with ALESTORM and their raison d’etre, I point directly to lead off track off new offering Curse of The Crystal Coconut: “We’re only here to have fun.” Ahoy.

Plainly put: you cannot listen to ALESTORM and have a bad time. Throughout their entire discography they bring the ruckus and the rum and the fine shanty tunes aplenty, bursting with sing along parts and unapologetic levity. In a world so often overshadowed with dismay and deluged by misery, ALESTORM are a steady ship upon otherwise choppy and uncaring seas. They just want you to enjoy life. Oh, and drink every ounce of alcohol you have. Twice.

Curse of The Crystal Coconut does little with their tried and true formula, ALESTORM at the top of their wave on this most recent quest across the waves for total domination of the Pirate Metal realms. Yeah, that’s a thing. “Shit Boat” is easily one of the most fun songs they have written since “Fucked With An Anchor”. And that says a lot since all their songs are fun. I mean, in all honesty, check yourself if you don’t smile at either.

In plain language: ALESTORM are deserving of your attention and have been for their entire career and shall continue. If you can’t laugh at yourself, call them, they will. And I will too. Ahoy! Hide your rum.

4.0 Out Of 5.0